USS Murgatroid

Excerpts from the Murgatroid's Logs

Aliens: People and Things We've Met

We think these two are spies -- but not very good ones. They captured Captain Jellico and Storvik, but just asked them a bunch of stupid questions, sang some songs, and let them go fifteen minutes later. The one on the left was at least concerned that their captives were getting enough oxygen...

LEFT(2): This alien demanded something called "TP" (Storvik's best guess was that "TP" stood for "Technobabble Particles") for his "Black Hole"... The connection was bad, and the alien got increasingly hostile as we failed to meet his demands. So we shot him.

RIGHT(2): These aliens were creepy, kooky, mysterious, spooky, and (in the expert opinion of Science Officer Storvik) "altogether ooky."

We had never encountered a "Jedi Knight" before, but we sincerely hope that they aren't all like this one. He claims to be something called a "Redneck Jedi" and carried a "Coors Litesaber"... The picture to the right is apparently what Jedis are supposed to look like, only without the 20th Century Earth musical instruments...

LEFT: The Murgatroid has never managed to meet any Greek or Roman "gods" or other aliens who've influenced Earth history; but Storvik and Ensign Pirahna have met the alien who inspired the "King Kong" legends...
CENTER: Jellico meets Death. Neither is impressed.
RIGHT: This race was exceedingly cute. Jellico dated a few during out brief shore leave there; he was upset that he didn't have time to "collect them all."

LEFT: This fiendish alien tried to steal Christmas! But once Storvik realized that its heart was merely two sizes too small, he reconfigured the Murgatroid's sensor array to emit a stream of cardio-rebigulator particles, cured the alien, and saved the day!
CENTER: This alien, being restrained by Head of Security T'Quad and ship's botanist Alabama, is called a BoogMan. Neither T'Quad nor Alabama was ordered to restrain the BoogMan or keep his under surveillance at all times, but they did anyway. When questioned by Storvik, they remarked that they were interested in the Boogman because of an interesting anatomical oddity -- it seems BoogMen can breathe through their ears.
RIGHT: The Murgatroid found another survivor of the Chiron race, long thought extinct since Captain Kirk's encounter with them a century ago. Unfortunately, while onboard the Murgatroid, his white and black halves killed each other.

This was a mercenary force known as COBRA. Tough, well armed, sneaky, and downright evil. "Penny-ante operators," Jellico called them, and dropped them off with the Iotians.

These loud and incomprehensible aliens stood in water and bellowed incomprehensibly (even with the Universal Translator) until the Murgatroid's crew ignored them and went away.